The Haney Family Chilean Winery and Hot Springs Tour!

I’ve been bugging my folks to come down and visit me in Chile ever since I first docked in Puerto Montt four months ago.  Eventually all the tales of fjords, hot springs, and cheap wine were enough to persuade them and they booked tickets to overlap with my brother.  In true Haney fashion, there were lots of delicious meals, a few bottles (boxes?) of wine consumed, and plenty of mountainous scenery to take in.  

Chile’s bus systems are really well organized and efficient.  I’ve taken dozens of busses – local, regional, long distance, international – and they’ve all been clean, comfortable, on time, and cheap.  The overnight bus to Santiago was no exception.  Porter and I fell asleep in our cushy reclining “semi-cama” (sort of a bed) chairs and woke up well rested in the middle of Santiago.  We took another bus to the airport and waited anxiously for our parent’s flight to arrive. 

It was a truly joyous reunion and smiles, hugs, & high fives abounded.  Our connecting flight to Coyhaique didn’t leave for an hour or two, so we elected to head to the airport bar for a quick glass of wine to catch up.  The last time we were hanging out, I was getting ready to sail to the Galapagos (and my parents were probably wondering if I’d get struck by lightning or eaten by a whale), so we had plenty to catch up on!  The flight went smoothly and we got beautiful views of the Andes when we weren’t shrouded in clouds.

We even happened to fly right over the top of the Rascal where she was docked near Puerto Montt.  

I was in charge of rental cars for the southern portion of our trip and we ended up with a boxy Mitsubishi SUV to deal with the eternally muddy dirt roads of Patagonia.  It was only my second time driving in six months, and I was being very careful and cautious.  However, I only managed to drive about a hundred meters before a “Carabinero” (Chilean police officer) started making hand signals at me.  It looked like the “rubbing your stomach while patting your head” sort of gig.  He was wearing a particularly Russian looking fur hat and he seemed to be having quite a bit of fun with his hand coordination exercises.  I slowed down and noticed that he was looking away from me – to some distant part of the parking lot.  “Must be signaling someone else,” I figured and drove right on past him.

That was a mistake, it turned out.  As I passed him, he lost his shit and started waving his arms around and chasing after us.  I immediately pulled over and he came right up to my window, asking in rapid (and barely comprehensible) Spanish why the hell I didn’t stop when he gave me the universal “pull your law-breaking ass over” hand signals.  I explained that I wasn’t familiar with that particular hand signal and offered a thousand apologies for the ignorance of a stupid gringo.  We were directly in front of the airport at this point and several amused locals and tourists looked on with great interest.  He carefully inspected all of my documents for a few minutes and let us go on our way.  We all let out a sigh of relief.  

After checking into our little B&B, we set out to explore town and get something to eat.  Coyhaique is a cute little town with the classic center plaza and lots of restaurants and bars.  We happened into one that specialized in roasted meats (surprise, surprise) and started off our time in Patagonia right with a couple bottles of wine and a bunch of tender delicious carne.  

Porter practicing his contemplative beard stroke in front of the restaurant

We all awoke well rested the next morning and set our sights towards Aysen and Chacabuco, a couple of port towns to our west.  Aysen is a castellanization of the English words “Ice End” because it was the spot along the coast where the glaciers stopped flowing into the sea.  For a long time, it was the only large port for hundreds of miles, but overgrazing, irresponsible logging, and some enormous fires sent immense amounts of sediment down the river that Aysen straddles to the point that it was no longer navigable for large ships.  At this point, all of the commercial and fishing traffic goes to the relatively new town of Chacabuco which is situated at the mount of the river.  We had a lovely day exploring the two towns and treated ourselves to a big seafood lunch at a little hole-in-the-wall in Aysen.  

The drive between the two zones was gorgeous, with numerous waterfalls, towering peaks on all sides, and plenty of picturesque farmland in between.  

The next morning, we planned to get up before dawn (to beat a road closure due to construction) and drive to the town of Puyuhuapi along the Carretera Austral.  The Carretera is the only highway that runs south of Puerto Montt, stretching some 1240 kilometers through the mountainous countryside of southern Chile.  It is connected in lots of places by ferries because of the difficulty and cost of building bridges in the fjords.   

We couldn’t drive more than ten minutes without stopping to take pictures.  There were ginormous mountains all around us the entire time with hundreds of waterfalls cascading down into the valley.  

Showers and sunshine flirted with us all day with the result that we saw literally dozens of rainbows (the love children of the rain and sun!).  

There were lots of livestock and llamas grazing on the lush grasses in the bottom of the valley and more than one river ran through it.  

As we worked up and over a monster mountain pass, we got some excellent views of some glaciers up in the far reaches of the hills.  

Eventually we made it to the first stop on our Chilean Winery and Hot Springs Tour, a little nook called Termas del Ventisquero.  

Its nestled into the coastline of a fjord just south of Puyuhuapi and the springs overlook the sea.  

We happened to have snuck some wine in, and relaxed in the springs all afternoon, watching the weather roll past and spotting dolphins out in the fjord.

A few of us even decided to take the plunge in to the cold sea water despite the risk of substantial shrinkage.  

Puyuhuapi was settled more than a hundred years by German immigrants and a sizeable portion of its current population descended from those original few.  We happened to be staying with an old German woman who spoke only Spanish and had a tremendous garden behind the hotel.  My mom mentioned that she was impressed by it, and she suddenly found herself gifted with a bag full of wildflower seeds and a handful of beans.  They weren’t just any beans, however.  These were pole beans that had been planted for literally generations and were brought over from the “motherland” by those original German immigrants in the 1800s.  My mom was able to successfully smuggle them back into the states, so we’ll get to see how they grow in Wyoming!  

We had a big seafood dinner at the only restaurant in town and woke up early the next morning to head to our next hot spring – Termas de Puyuhuapi!  

Termas de Puyuhuapi is on the other side of the fjord, so there is no way to drive there – a boat ride is the only way.  We motored across with fairly calm seas and pulled up to this charming resort.  

They have a variety of different indoor and outdoor pools of varying temperatures and the grounds are gorgeous.  

It was definitely the priciest stop on our Chilean Winery and Hot Springs Tour, but we snuck a few boxes of cab in to take the edge off.  

We even got up before dawn the next morning for a little sunrise soak.  

The drive back through the mountains along the carretera was just as gorgeous as it had been on the drive up, and we took some time lollygagging in the town of Puerto Cisnes on the drive back.  Lots of tall craggy-looking peaks stuck their ugly heads out as we drove past and Porter and I managed to spot dozens of ski lines that would take days of jungle bushwhacking to get to.

After some more fine dining in Coyhaique, we caught a flight back to Santiago and began the northern half of our Chilean jaunt.  

We were staying in the small town of Santa Cruz which is in the heart of the Colchagua Valley – home to dozens of wineries.  Day one started at a fairly new winery with French roots that is owned by the Marnier family (think Grand Marnier!).  The whole winery is built into a hillside with several levels for fermentation, bottling, aging etc so that they can just use gravity to transfer the wine between levels instead of pumps.  

The architecture was impressive and the wine definitely didn’t suck.

The next stop was for lunch at a restaurant that was attached to another winery.  The food was top-notch.  So good, in fact, that it induced a quick Haney nap in the car before our next tour. 

The second tour was at a much older winery and it had a much more Chilean feel to it.  Luckily for our sleep-weakened legs, the tour was conducted via horse-and-buggy and we got to see some of the countryside.  My dad even snuck a taste right out of the fermentation tank!   

After such a big day of swilling, we elected to spend the next day seeing the northern coast.  There are lots of little fishing villages dotting the coast and we spent a lot of time beach walking and looking out at the sea.  

A bit further to the north lies the town of Pichilemu, a boomtown that has been growing increasingly popular for its famous surf break at Punta de Lobos.  There was a pretty good size swell rolling in and we spent an hour or two watching surfers get pummeled by the Pacific.  

We’d heard about an incredible empanada shop that makes dozens of different flavors and we had to check it out for ourselves.  Among the flavors we tried: Crab, scallop, & cheese as well as chicken, cheese, & merken (smoked Chilean peppers).  They were all absolutely delicious – it was definitely a worthy stop.

Predictably, eating so many glorious empanadas sent the Haney clan into an afternoon nap tailspin and we (also predictably) woke up just in time for cocktail hour.  We quickly found a bar along the beach, had a few snacks and pisco sours, and watched the surf roll in.  Pisco is a type of Chilean brandy that is absolutely delicious and gets nestled right behind wine as the national drink.  Its almost always sold as a “pisco sour” which tastes something like a boozy lemonade.  

Unfortunately, Chile’s lunch and dinner timing doesn’t match the internal clock of your average Haney and we found they were closing for a two hour break between lunch and dinner just as we were getting fired up for a good sunset. 

It quickly became clear that there was only one solution to such an unfortunate timing – we would have to bridge the gap with pisco.  They were totally accommodating and served up two chilled pitchers of pisco sour to tide us over before they locked things up.  As you can imagine, that went over really well with us, and we spent the sunset sitting on their back deck playing cribbage and enjoying our delicious cocktails.  To their great surprise, we were still there when they got back and we decided to have dinner on the spot!

The next day, we pulled out of Santa Cruz early and worked our way further up the coast to visit another winery.  We stopped and chowed on seafood (among other things) during the drive up and the scenery was spectacular.  

For this post, I asked my parents and brother each to write a little blurb about the trip with the topic totally up to their choosing.  Their command of the Spanish language can be a little lacking at time, so I was always doing the ordering in restaurants and sometimes we got "interesting" results.  My dad is an adventuresome eater (to say the least), but some of the Chilean seafood specialties were at the edge of his limit.  Here's what he had to say!

When your vagabond son convinces you to eat some strange critter, make sure you have your stomach fully fastened down. This was just one of the incredibly weird things he forced me to sample. Perhaps one of the worst was black harry seafood ball in a mixed soup of 5 inch muscles, fish of some unidentified type, clams, and a random little shrimp. At least he didn't force me to eat the red insides of massive barnacles, of course, he didn't taste those either. But seriously, when your son invites you on a family extravaganza trip like this, make sure you savor every moment of it! Life is short!

Lucky for my dad, the vineyard tour we had planned for the afternoon included a wine and cheese pairing to help satiate his hunger.  This particular winery was the first in Chile to be certified organic and their tour focused on some of the biodynamic practices they use to avoid chemical fertilizer and pesticides.  It was instructive and totally different from the other two wine tours, with lots of animals roaming around the winery and a bunch of other plants they use to help regulate the growing process.    

From there it was a short drive to the city of Valparaiso, just west of Santiago and the largest port in all of Chile.  Valparaiso has a long history and lots of windy streets and colorful buildings.  We were following some google maps directions around and found one extra-steep street that our rental car didn’t have quite enough traction to negotiate despite numerous valiant attempts by Porter, our chauffer.  We left some rubber behind as a momento.  

Having been in the countryside all week, everything was a little overwhelming, but we checked into our hotel and went out in search of adventure.  We found it in the form of a perfect rooftop bar to take in the sunset and a few local beers.  

The next day was Saturday and we managed to find a few incredible markets to walk around.  There was everything from produce to seafood to handicrafts and we ate more than our fair share of empanadas as we browsed.  

Valparaiso also has an incredible collection of stray dogs - which brings me to my brother's submission - an ode to the street dogs of Chile!

There's always one thing that happens on a Haney family trip.  You never know what that one thing is going to be, but you will know it when it happens.  In the past it's been everything from singing The Beach Boys - Kokomo so many times that we wore the tape deck out - to saying "Bonjour" every time your brother is peeing in the woods pretending there was a family of French Canadians around the corner waiting to bust you for peeing in public.

On this trip to Southern Chile the thing was --- Street Dogs! 

There are a bunch friendly pups that hang out on the sidewalks and alleys of every town.  They're looking for a bite of steak or a kind pet from a passerby.  Unlike a lot of street dogs, these dogs are very friendly.  In fact, a quick rub of the ears might make you a day long friend that'll follow you through miles of city walking.  These dogs seem to have developed a sixth sense for not getting hit by cars, kicked by surly humans, or in fights with theirs peers - by and large they're living the doggie dream.

You might ask what do these fellas have to do with that one thing on a Haney family trip?  Well, Mom ended up taking pictures of every last one she could get to sit still, and even some she couldn't!  And, Dad, well he couldn't help but whistle at each and every one of him.  Turns out his whistle could be construed for the whistle the young men in Chile use to harass the young women!  Tsk tsk!  

These dogs were an absolute highlight of the trip.  They were everywhere, they were friendly, and they didn't mind a little loving from a Haney.

Which, of course, segues beautifully into my Mom's submission to this blog, an ode to the wine of Chile!

I have to admit that my love for the "Chile Dogs" was only out-done by my love for Chilean wine!  Walking back to our hostel each night we'd see lots of dogs sleeping (or passed out) on the sidewalks.  Too much wine you ask?    It's totally possible.  

When we were in Mexico, it was tough to get wine with dinner, but beer was available on every street corner.  To my delight, the situation was reversed in Chile!  Chilean wine is cheap and tasty and it doesn't make you have to find a bathroom every hour.  You can drink it cold or room temp.  It's great to take to the beach (one of my favorite spots) and it always makes life seem more simple.  The Chilean folks truly have it figured out. 

I didn't think I was a Cabernet drinker, but that all changed in Chile.  Dwy had the whole "boxed wine" thing figured out and he even knew to get the screw-cap type so we could carry it around like a bota bag.  He is my child!  So smart!  He even brought a couple of metal cups from the Rascal to keep us from breaking glasses.  David, who doesn't usually drink a lot of wine, managed to fall for the Chilean wine too.  It was wonderful to sit in the hot springs and drink wine with the rain hitting your shoulders.  

It was also great fun to tour all the different vineyards with David and our boys.  So yes, I did love the wine and the dogs of Chile.  Of all the dogs I saw, however, I loved the three big dogs I was traveling with the most.  They made the trip!

After a lunch laden with wine, we met up with a friend of mine that took us on a tour of Viña del Mar, a resort town to the north, and we ended up catching the best sunset of the whole trip on the drive back.  The clouds were low and it felt like the whole sky was on fire.    

We ate some classic Chilean food that night, with plenty of meat, a little bit of “pastel del chocolo”, and a bottle of delicious carmenere.  There were even a few late night sliding shenanigans on the way back to our hotel.  

Unfortunately the final day of the trip had come and the whole gang had to get back to Santiago for flights and busses to all corners of the globe.  We got a nice big breakfast in us to make sure we were properly fueled for a big day of travel.  

On our way into the big city, we took a detour to the south along the coast to check out one of Pablo Neruda’s houses and lo-and-behold, we happened into a big delicious seafood lunch as well.  

One final pisco sour sealed the trip perfectly and we all went our separate ways.  

Next on the docket?  A couple weeks of skiing volcanos in southern Chile with long-lost buddies!